Well, actually, I really do want to say something. First of all, I am super proud of how it all played out. Proud that I was in a hospital that would let me, pregnant with TWINS, do a vaginal birth after two cesareans (I'm a little bit of a birthing celebrity among the team here). Proud that I DID IT!! I'm grateful that the old scars stayed intact, grateful that the team knew how and was willing to pull the second baby out by her feet, grateful that they were able to revive her breathing once she out. I'm grateful that they let me in at all! When I started labor the midwife unit was technically "closed". They had already sent more than one mom to another hospital because they were at capacity, but they squeaked me in because, as my night nurse told me, they were afraid that the other hospital would not let me try the VBAC. (She said that when I called to say I was in labor and that I was expecting it to go fast she put me on hold and the team had a little pow-wow about where they would put me and how they'd work it out.) I'm so thankful and proud that my cousin Cait was there. When I was in the throws of it I would remember that Cait was in the room and I was proud that my strong, beautiful cousin was a witness to something that was so hard to do and special and cool. It was great!
Of course I am very thankful that the stars aligned and the babies were able to reach full term and the VBAC was successful. It all went without much of a hitch, and I do not take that for granted. My sister is probably waitiing to hold her premature baby in the special care unit right now or pumping so that little Charlotte can have some breastmilk. And Emily is no less capable or willing to carry a baby to term or birth non-surgically than I am. The cards played differently for her. This time around my best efforts got me to full term. Thank goodness Emily put in her best efforts, too. She carried her baby to almost 34 weeks despite dangerously low fluid, staying on strict bedrest in the hospital in addition to at home, and now, only four days old, Charlotte is breathing without assistance and getting more and more skin to skin time with her parents every day. I'm so happy to hear about every step Emily and Mike take closer to getting Charlotte hold with them. You guys are doing great.
But as proud as I am of birthing these twins I must say I could not have done the great incubating I had done without Ben. Really. Ben made it possible for me to take a nap EVERY DAY, even if it meant being late to work or juggling kids or being super sleepy himself. He helped me eat a lot and made me lots of hard boiled eggs, grilled cheese sandwiches and protein shakes and even got me a family size gallon of ice cream so every shake could be amply spiked with ice cream. He got up with kids morning after morning so I could get more sleep, excused me of all night time cleaning up, emptied the dishwasher every time and cleaned the kitchen every night, brought laundry up and down--and anything else that I pointed at... He just gave me the space, the time and support so I could focus on growing big, healthy twins. And whenever I felt bad about him running himself ragged he reminded me that my job was to "grow those babies" and not to worry about it. I really don't think they would have gotten so big and healthy or stayed in so long if they weren't given all that extra focus allowed by Ben. Thank you so much, Ben. You are my teammate and my real love.
So this is my Acknowledgements page in the book about our family. I've been alone most of the time here at the hospital while Ben has tried to give the boys a "normal" day before the babies come home (another sacrifice - he has spent precious few hours alone with his daughters since they were born yesterday morning) so I've lots of time to feel warm and fuzzy about everything. I'm just really happy. Everybody's babies are out and we can all start the long journey of becoming new families.
I just can't stop smiling about it all.
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